When Obama ran for president, I remember deciding to support him despite my many liberal friends telling me I was throwing my money and vote away, that our country wasn't ready to elect a black man. On election night, I don't remember ever feeling so proud to be an American - that we as a nation had moved far away from our cruel past and choose this smart, kind, unlikely professor type to lead us during a very scary time. (I remember seriously thinking that year that we should take our money out of even the largest US banks because of the fragility of our economy.)
The next seven years have shown Obama to be just a man, with flaws like the rest of us, but one that loves his country enough to sacrifice the enormous amount of time and energy it has taken to lead us into a better place across every economic indicator. And yet, the very fact that he is president, perhaps even more so that he has been successful, seems to have inflamed so many people.
These are not bad people, and most in my opinion do not even know why it is that the very mention of the man drives them crazy. I suspect it is because they do not even know that their worldview, cultivated by every experience they've had and the stories handed down through their families, is threatened by the triumph of Obama. If you are reading this and shaking your head right now with how wrong I am - take a moment, pause, and just feel your body. Are you calm, rational? Is it the same as if we were debating the best college in the US or what color of car to buy? Or in your heart of hearts, just to yourself, can you admit that there is something more, something irrational, fearful about your response? This does not make you an awful person - it makes you a human being encountering new information that threatens very deep, often unspoken beliefs about the world.
The same is true with regards to same sex marriage. Fear and love are a continuum and there are a lot of people at every point along that path. I have had the great pleasure of knowing and loving many gay friends, of seeing their very human, mundane relationships up close and understanding long ago that their commitments to each other are no different than those of heterosexuals. For other people, the only experience they may have with gay people is what they see on tv, or a story about a friend of a friend.
For others, people in their religious lives have long told them that marriage between gay people is a sin. There are a lot of passages of the bible that can be used to separate us - those that work on Sundays, eat crab or even wear different threads of clothing together and many more are condemned if you are looking for ways to judge others.
However, the ultimate truth of the bible and most religions is bigger than that, and those that truly love Christ and others like him know that. Christ doesn't ask us to tolerate others or to accept them - we are called to something greater, to love one another. Anything less than that is not enough.
To say you are going to pray for the children of gay families, to say that you are going to accept gays along with the other sinners in your life is quite honestly...arrogant. None of us is the creator, none can argue with certainty that everyone today isn't perfect exactly as they are. That said, even when I see that stuff in my fb news feed, that's when I get the opportunity to grow. That's right, everyone along the continuum, even those still stuck in the darkest, most hateful of places is deserving of love, and perhaps need it even more.
So while there are moments along the way that will bring us to our knees in agony, have us shaking our heads in frustration or tempted to throw our computer out the window in anger...we are all in this together whether we like it or not. The choices ahead of you...how fearful or loving you face the world will determine your level of suffering or peace. It's in your hands.
